 When Lesley Stahl became a grandmother, she was stunned by the way it affected her emotionally. Ever the reporter, she set about to find out whether her experience was the norm. Becoming Grandma is the engaging, informative result of her research. As she shares stories of her transformation into Grandma, she explores the ways grandparents can play an important role in their grandchildren’s lives. Stahl offers insight into the complexities of a being a grandparent in today’s world, where a child may have four sets of grandparents and parents are inundated with parenting advice from the internet. This well-researched book is well worth reading--buy a copy and lend it out to your grandmother friends.
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What if you don’t have a backyard?  Nature buffers the impact of life’s stresses on children and helps them deal with adversity. The greater the amount of nature exposure, the greater the benefits.” *
Our last post gave you some ideas for creating a nature rich experience for your grandchildren in your backyard. But not everyone has a backyard! Don’t let that stop you from sharing the wonders and benefits of the natural world with your grandchildren. With a little effort, you can take them regularly to wild places. What counts as wild? Anywhere that lets them explore and experience nature. Let them climb boulders and balance on logs, let them try to dam up a stream, let them feel the power of a wave. Need help finding somewhere near you? Here are some places to look: Botanic gardens and arboretums often have spaces designed for children to play and explore. Even those that don’t have plenty of places to roam and engage with nature. Click here to find one near you. Nature preserves and wildlife refuges are wonderful places to search for lizards or wander through trees and over bridges. They range from redwood forests to coastal wetlands, and can be located here. National Parks are home to over 17,000 miles of trails and habitat protection for endangered species, and provide bountiful opportunities to explore nature. Find a park here. The shores of lakes, rivers and oceans are varied and fascinating to children. Sandy beaches provide the chance to dig, sift, and search for different kinds of shells and sea life. Rocky shorelines provide boulders to climb and tidepools inhabited by sea stars and crabs. The Travel Channel has a great guide to beaches. Aquariums allow kids to see what’s under the sea, and most have touch tanks that let kids see and feel sea life up close. To find an aquarium near you, search here. What’s your favorite place to take kids to interact with nature? *Wells & Evans 2003 
Do you remember playing outside as a child? I spent hours upon hours playing in the woods: making elaborate houses with fallen branches, shaping dishes out of the clay we found in the soil, decorating with flowers and leaves. I remember climbing trees so high I got dizzy and had to be coached back down. There were games of hide and seek in the tall grass of an empty lot across the street, and in the winter, elaborate snow forts and all-neighborhood snowball fights.
Children need nature. And not just seeing it, but experiencing it: the feel of grass under their feet, the sound of the birds in the woods, the smell of wet dirt. Studies have shown that children who play regularly in natural environments exhibit more advanced motor fitness, including coordination, balance and agility, and they are sick less often*. But for too many children, time playing in nature is a rare treat. So how can we, as grandparents, help? Make your yard a place for exploration. Provide them with natural elements for creative play: sticks and stones and leaves and dirt and water. Keep a place for them to dig for worms. Let them make forts in your bushes and move the rocks in your border. Let them climb your trees and hang from the branches. Let them lie on the grass and watch the bugs. Let them go barefoot and let them get dirty. It can be that easy. But if you want more ideas for making your backyard into a child-friendly play space, I highly recommend Molly Dannenmaier’s book, A Child’s Garden. She provides dozens of ideas and inspiration for creating natural play areas that fit into adult gardens. For more about the crucial role nature plays for all of us, read The Nature Fix by Florence Williams. No backyard? No problem. I’ll share ideas for connecting children to nature in my next post. *Grahn, et al. 1997, Fjortoft & Sageie 2001
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 The Secrets to Making a Difference While Having the Time of Your Life
Linda Eyre has a large family: nine children and 31 grandchildren (as of the writing of the book in 2018). Her previous books on motherhood gained her loyal followers across the globe, and it is those fans who will probably enjoy this book most. Eyre shares the steps she and her husband have taken to strengthen the bonds with their large and far-flung brood, but many of them are very specific to a large, religious, financially advantaged family. Much of the book is a walk through her own stories and relationships. While there are some useful ideas and inspiring stories buried within, I found myself skimming through the personal parts to get to the promised secrets. Ultimately, I didn’t find much advice that hadn’t been covered more succinctly in other books, such as Jane Isay’s Unconditional Love. Eyre ends the book with a chapter of recipes to feed a crowd. It’s a nice touch, but for those of us not cooking for 20+ people, not very valuable. If your library has a copy of Grandmothering, it’s worth taking a look to see if you think it will be useful for you. This site contains affiliate links to products I have personally chosen to share. I may receive a commission for purchases made through these links. Every penny helps support this site and allows me to visit my grandchildren, so thank you for your support!  The world feels like a much scarier place than it did just a week ago. The numbers of people getting sick with Covid-19 are increasing exponentially. Communities are pulling together while we all try to stay away from one another. Family disappointments are piling up: graduations, trips to see new babies, weddings—all cancelled or postponed. Just when we need each other, we are told to stay apart. Experts tell us it will get worse before it gets better. Grandparents, it is at times like this that you are needed most. What every family needs right now is someone to turn to who can help make it feel safer. Who better than you? No matter how shaky you feel, here are some ways for you to be a source of strength and wisdom as your family battles the stress they are experiencing because of the coronavirus pandemic.  Did you serve in a war? Live through the polio era? Spend time unemployed and broke? Watch a loved one struggle with illness or addiction?
Most of us have faced hard times and come through stronger. Share your stories with your family, especially if you never have before. Stories are the foundation of strong families, and now is the perfect time to strengthen those foundations.  Earlier this week, my newest granddaughter arrived and surprised us all. Not only was she two weeks early, but my son and his wife hadn’t found out this baby’s gender, and all bets were on them having a boy. It was a disorienting moment when I got the news—I had a moment of wondering who was sending me a baby picture. But as soon as the truth of her being sunk in, I immediately fell in love. Then I started to worry a little.
We had made careful plans to make sure that this growing family had help. With a not-yet two-year-old and a not-yet four-year-old, a new baby means a lot of little mouths to feed and hands to keep busy. I went to visit a couple weeks ago and filled the freezer, and my daughter-in-law’s parents were planning to come a few days before her due date to help on the scene. I have a trip booked in a month, which was intended to correspond with her parents leaving. Now there is a week that they’ll be on their own before her parents can get there, and there will be a bigger gap before I arrive for my turn as extra adult. I’ve got enough airline miles to make an extra trip or change my flight. But I can’t go earlier for an important reason: I have three other adult children. Since they are all on academic calendars this year, they are each planning a spring break visit home in the next month. I don’t ever want my children to think they come second to my grandchildren. I know my son and his wife will figure it out together, and no one will actually die of sleep deprivation.  Going anywhere with young children requires patience and, in the words of Mad Eye Moody, constant vigilance. It also helps to have a few tricks in your bag. Though my grandchildren live in another state, if they are visiting me or I am visiting them, I make sure to add a few things to my purse:
What do you keep in your bag for your grandchildren?  Face it, if you are a grandparent, you are officially getting old. Even if your first grandchild was born when you were 40, your body is chugging along towards aching joints and bad digestion. But a study out of London suggests that grandchildren can actually help you feel younger, by encouraging you to take part in the activities you loved as a kid. Yes, being silly can keep you young. Grandchildren are the perfect excuse to play Crazy Eights or War, card games with simple rules and satisfying moments of victory without any strategy required. They are the ideal partners for walking through the neighborhood pretending to hunt for bears or bad guys. They give you a reason to dress in silly clothes and drink pretend tea with teddy bear guests. They offer you the chance to chant nonsensical nursery rhymes and dance to songs about brushing your teeth. Even as they get older and think they are too cool to act silly, there are ways to get them laughing with you. Try a game of “Would you rather” where you offer them two ridiculous options and they have to choose one. (“Would you rather only be able to walk or all fours or walk sideways like a crab?”) Let them know what your answers would be, too! Find some great questions here. Want some help plugging into your silly side? Here are some of our favorite books and songs:
This site contains affiliate links to products I have personally chosen to share. I may receive a commission for purchases made through these links. Every penny helps support this site and allows me to visit my grandchildren, so thank you for your support!
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