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What to say when you hate your grandbaby's name

6/5/2020

3 Comments

 
Pregnant woman holding up sign with baby's name
When you first heard what your future grandchild was to be named, were you instantly alarmed?

"Muriel is too old-fashioned!"  "Juniper is too modern!"

"Slade is just weird!"  "Feebee? Spell it right!"

"I knew a dreadful girl named Lindsay!"

"George is such an ugly name!"

Of course you have opinions—names are powerful and, usually, permanent. One in five grandparents admits to hating a grandchild’s name. Actually hating it! What do you do if you are one of them?

First, what you don’t do: tell your grandchild’s parents that you hate it. You don’t need to fake enthusiasm, but you do not want to be among the 2% of grandparents who have a permanent falling-out over something that is, ultimately, none of your business. Grandparenting is one long lesson in when to bite your tongue, and it starts here.

If you can do so without revealing how much you dislike their choice, ask why the name is meaningful to them. Their reasons may help you see the name in a different light. Perhaps George was a beloved uncle, or Lindsay a best friend who died young.
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Next, realize that the name will likely grow on you as soon as you have a delightful baby to attach it to--more than 75% of the grandparents who initially disliked their grandchild's name have learned to accept it over time. If you really can’t stand it, try out a nickname that will be your special name for the child. Two things to be careful of: if the parents object, respect their wishes. And make sure it’s something that you can use when they are a teenager! 

Did you hate your grandchild's name when you first heard it? Please share your experience in the comments!

Have you downloaded our free New Grandparent Checklist yet? It's full of ideas for getting ready for this exciting new role! 

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3 Comments
Donna
6/23/2022 09:35:50 am

I appreciate the fact that it is their choice for their child. I realize that there might be a reason for their choice. Yet, if it is a name a grandparent loathe to an extent they can’t even fathom saying and there is no reason at all for choosing that name other than the fact they like it. I believe it is right to tell your own child how you feel about their choice in a good way. I don’t believe in not being honest. You can give your opinion in a constructive way and express your feelings. You tell them why the name bothers you so much. Maybe it is a name of a person who bullied you in high school and every time you hear that name it brings back memories of that time in your life. It is your grandchild’s name. If the parents are at all respectful of their parents and listen to their reasoning of why they hate the name. They should be respect and honour their parents. And after all the discussions have been done and the parents to still name the child that name knowing how it effects the grandparents, then they are selfish and none caring. There are million of names to choose from and it takes a family to raise this child not just the parents to be.

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Emma
10/15/2022 05:15:34 pm

Absolutely not! It's none of the grandparents business or choice. YOU had your children, YOU named yours. No one else told YOU what to name YOUR children. Entitled grandparents will be the death of me.

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Bonnietumbles
9/8/2022 04:55:14 pm

My daughter picked Sacha. Ew. What is she an old Russian spy. I guess because of the Obamas? I have both of their girls names. Malia sounds like a disease and Sacha is just an ugly name. She picked Gianna but then changed it. Yuck yuck yuck.

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