Does mindfulness fit with your goals as a grandparent? ![]() As an Amazon affiliate, I may receive a commission for purchases made through links in this post at no additional cost to you. Thank you for helping to keep this site ad-free. Finally! Covid restrictions had eased, we’d all been vaccinated, and we were going to spend a glorious six days with our grandchildren and their parents! It had been seven months since we’d seen them, and the baby had gone from a barely scooting bug to a fully walking toddler. We’d missed so much! I was determined to make the most of every day. I’d read Grandparenting: Renew, Relive, Rejoice and was committed to being fully present during the short time we’d have together. Within a day, I realized I’d forgotten something crucial: being with small children is an endurance sport, and I’m not an endurance athlete. Trying to be fully present created an intense overload on my system, especially after the cocoon I’d been living in during Covid. So how could I use the lessons of mindfulness to deepen our relationship without ending up longing for the end of the visit? What was I doing wrong, that one day with my grandchildren left me exhausted? That night, I reread my grandparent vision statement and Grand Plan*. No where did my grandparenting plan include being fully present at all times. What it did include was letting my grandchildren know they were important to me, and helping out my children as much as possible. I needed to take the principles of mindfulness and apply them to help me be the grandmother I wanted to be. There were five ways to be more mindful that I found fit well with my goals.
After that exhausting first day, I adjusted my expectations and my actions. I spent some of the time focused on the grandchildren, and some of the time folding laundry or straightening the playroom. I skipped bath time to clean up the kitchen after dinner, and took a morning to meet with a friend. I soaked up as much as I could when I was with them, but even sponges have limits! Recognizing mine, and making sure that my actions reflected my values, made the visit more rewarding for all of us. *Do your actions as a grandparent fit with your grandparenting goals? New Grandparents Essentials can help you be the grandparent you want to be, even if you aren't a new grandparent. Start today to create your own Grandparent Vision Statement and Grand Plan!
2 Comments
Genevieve Jackman
7/5/2022 04:48:35 am
I wish I had read this blog before visiting my grandkids in Australia earlier this year ! I had not met my little grandson before due to covid and had not seen my granddaughter for 3 years !! I was there for 5 weeks staying in a 2 bed apartment in the city with my son daughter in law and 2 grandkids. My relationship with my daughter in law is strained and I still cant fathom how to rectify this ~ I know I tread on eggshells while there! I never felt comfortable with doing the early morning wake up as I worried that I just wouldn't do things correctly and would not be able to keep them quiet so mum and dad could sleep!! and I feel it was frowned on that I didn't and now on hindsight I wish I had tried and not been such a coward!!
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DeeDee
7/5/2022 09:16:13 am
I'm sorry you didn't find the blog earlier! I hope you'll sign up to get new posts delivered to your email, as I often cover ways to help your relationships with adult children. Always feel free to email me with specific questions or topic suggestions, too! deedee@morethangrand.com
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