New Traditions to Start with Your Grandchildren

Grandmother cooking with grandkids

Do you want to start a special tradition with your grandchildren? Family traditions and simple rituals tie us to one another in a powerful way. The things we repeat year after year, visit after visit, create core memories for our grandchildren. These collective memories stick with our grandchildren far longer than things we buy them. They are usually even more potent than memories of elaborate, once-in-a-lifetime experiences.

The best part of these rituals is that they are simple and inexpensive. Most of them can be done whether you are a long-distance grandparent or one who lives next door. We’ve shared ideas for holiday traditions before. Here are some ideas for annual traditions at other times of year, starting with some special birthday traditions for grandchildren.

Birthday traditions to start with your grandchildren

Birthday interview: Each year on or near your grandchild’s birthday, conduct an interview with them. This is not just a way to get to know them. It also makes them feel special to be the focus of your attention. It makes a great addition to your time capsule! The interview can be in a letter, phone call or video chat. If you can do it in person, why not record it? Here are some suggested questions:

  1. How old are you?

  2. What is the thing you remember most from the last year?

  3. What can you do now that you are X that you couldn’t do before?

  4. What’s your favorite thing to eat? To drink?

  5. Who is your best friend?

  6. What’s your favorite place to go?

  7. What’s your favorite thing to play?

  8. What would you do if you were in charge of the world?

  9. What do you look forward to doing when you are older?

  10. What do you wish were different about your life?

Time Capsule: Every year, place a few items that remind you of your year together in a box. This can be as simple as a few photos—even screenshots of video chats count! Here are some other ideas to include.

  1. Something they’ve loved playing with at your house

  2. A menu or placemat from their favorite place to eat

  3. A recording of their favorite song

  4. A newspaper or magazine from the week of their birthday

  5. Something they’ve drawn or written

  6. A list of their current favorite things

Give your grandchild the accumulated time capsule on their 18th birthday or the eve of their high school graduation. They will love revisiting their past. They will also love knowing how much you were paying attention all those years. They might even ask you to keep up the tradition as they enter adulthood!

Family birthday photo collage: For their birthday every year, send them photos of their relatives at their age. Reach out to the other grandparents to collect as many as you can. Seeing that their parents, aunts, uncles, cousins, and grandparents were once all five years old is a blast. It’s also fun to compare family resemblances, and figure out where they got their hair color or their cleft chin. As they get older, it’s also helpful to see that their mom or dad looked just as awkward in middle school.

Delicious traditions to share with your grandchildren

Food is a powerful force for connection. Here are a couple of ways to include food in your annual traditions with your grandchildren.

Take them to “your” diner: Do your grandchildren live near you, or visit every summer? Start taking them to a special breakfast spot once a year. Celebrate the longest day of the year, their half-birthday, or just pick a date on the calendar and call it Grandpa and Grandkids’ day. If you go to the same place year after year, it will become your special place—and another strong bond between you.

Cook something special: Don’t have a favorite diner, or prefer to eat at home? You can create strong memories in your own kitchen. Make waffles on the first morning of their visit, or your famous spaghetti the night before they leave. Cook together as they get older, and share your family recipes with them.

The key with simple food rituals is repetition and rarity. If you make pancakes every single day, they aren’t a special occasion any more.

Make “The Eves” your time to connect

As much fun as it is to mark the holidays and big events in your grandchild’s life, making the day before a celebration your special time to connect can be a fun tradition. What sort of events? The start of a new school year, the day before their birthday, the night before Valentine’s Day. If you send a special message every year on those days, your message won’t get as lost in the excitement of the actual celebration.

Your tradition might be an annual kite flying day, a hike and picnic, or a trip to the tidepools. It doesn’t need to be something that takes a lot of preparation or expense. One of the best parts about creating an annual tradition to share with your grandchildren is that you only need to come up with the idea once. Year after year, that same activity or gesture will continue to be something you both look forward to. What’s more, the bond between you will grow deeper every time you repeat it.

Want more ideas for traditions and activities? Get Connection Sparks, with over 400 ways to connect with your grandchildren.

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Grandparenting with Grace: Teaching Values While Respecting Religious Boundaries